I usually never care about new year resolutions as I can never find a truly meaningful one, but this year I happened to make one. It was very unofficial and I barely mentioned it to anyone as I didn’t want to bear the pressure of failing. So at the beginning of January, I silently started to take a photo and writing a little bit everyday. I didn’t want to burden myself with rules that would restrict me so I didn’t make any. The only one I conceived was that I had to write and pick up my camera every single day of the year.
Three months have now gone and I am happy to say that I have and still am taking a photo and writing each day. It is not always easy but it is worthwhile. Photographing and writing have always been part of my life but I have never made a clear effort to better myself in those areas. Now that I am trying to learn more rigorously, I notice that I am making progress. The pace of it is very different from photography to writing.
I find photography easy. I grab my camera and instantly I am drawn into the picture in front of my eyes. The settings have become familiar and most of the time I know how to achieve what I’m aiming for. I enjoy this process immensely and no matter my mood I know that the simple fact of switching the camera on will focus all of my attention to the task at hand: taking a photograph. I still have a lot to learn and I am only just beginning to grasp the basic manual mode but I love experimenting with the lights and elements around me.
In contrast writing is excruciatingly difficult, the blinking cursor on the computer screen terrifying me most days. The words often refuse to come and it is only after I have forced a few hundreds out that I can start enjoying the writing. I know the difficulty doesn’t come so much from this painful start but rather from time restrictions. Writing is an activity that demands all of me for long stretches of time. I like to plunge into it and let it absorbs me. Unfortunately it is near impossible to do that around my working hours. So I end up with half an hour to forty-five minutes in the morning and an hour in the evening if I’m lucky. But I do not yet know how to switch my brain from one focus to another so frequently. I know I could most likely slot in longer writing time during the week but I am not sure if I am willing to. I do not want to give up my exploring on my days off and I do not want to give up my reading time in the evening. So I have to learn how to make the best of the time I do possess.
One thing I know for sure is that I won’t let those hurdles stop me from writing because even if at times it feels like a pointless effort, I am always reminded after a few hundreds words that I love writing, that it is liberating and that it is still my favourite creative playground.